(s) MOTHER- ing

Aakaar Films • July 20, 2020

A word of caution: It is only about women, for women and by women. They form this lineage of change of defining Mother-hood.

Do you feel

motherhood is the last mile of fulfilment to be defined a “complete woman?”
creation of a child completes a “woman,” whereas men’s creativity can only fulfilled through external sources?
for a woman, her children should be the first priority, beyond her own self?
a mother always, in any situation, wants the best for her child?

If your answer to any/all of the above is a “yes,” then you are not reading the right space of empowerment.

The origin of this word “Mother,” “Ma”, “Mama” still remains a mystery. This mystery gets into further depth when Indian mythology brings in the definition of

“strength (shakti) with exceptional love towards all (matritva), actually merging it with defining brhamaand or the universe.

I am quite amused at the loaded responsibility a woman gets from the peripheral operational energies as a girl child. It amuses me further at the expectations of deliverables that this universal definition puts on a soul with a humane body. It sickens me to see the struggles that millions of women go through to prove their mettle “because I am a mother!”

Let us begin from the very beginning.

A girl child looks at the only female body as the first touch – it is called “Mummy”, “Mama”, “Mata,” and more in various dialects. This body does not only feed her food, but also fodder of feelings. This body generates energy that is felt by each cell, bone and marrow of the girl child, as she shares a generic wave of the pool of female-ness.

A girl turned woman is also brought up with this claim, that, that a mother always wants the best for her (can be read as for all her children). It is a far cry from the real truth.

A woman, especially in India that is not defined and confined in its Metros-exual cities, but in small towns where IQ’s & EQ’s are mis-matched, waits for that special moment where a meagre sexual encounter (s) delivers the discovery of her pregnancy. This takes shape under various situations and circumstances, few pointers as below:

Must get pregnant with-in two years of her marriage (if not before).

Her knowledge and decisions are never questioned

Must get pregnant, if her marriage is not working. Then, there will be no escape
Must get pregnant by all means, as only then she is a “complete woman”

The above reasons of giving birth to a child makes her a mother by name not by actions. Such mothers, who have inability to make choice/s, choose the inevitable. They, who are already posted as weaker sections of a male-dominated society, exhibit their feebler strength on the dependent infant – her child. Thus, begins a tumultuous journey of that God’s child into hands of an (im)moral parent, called Mother. She redirects all her unfulfilled ambitions, frustrations, anger with harassment, by smothering the child slowly but steadily – till the wounds get engraved in the innocent heart for years of her youth, middle age and if not taken care of – from the cradle to the grave.

If footsteps are traced back, it will not be a surprising revelation that the violent environment of the world today, comprises mostly of these wounded children, whose bodies may have achieved adulthood, but souls have still not healed.

In this millennial, where feminism is not restricted to be defined as bra-burning women, but those who have equally empowered physical bodies, matched with their demanding desires with power of their intellectual and spiritual beauty. Such an empowered mother, who has not birthed a child into this world by giving in to pressures of social norms, but by her inner choice/s. She lives and breathes her own freedom with loving care, which reflects in an evolved empowered human being, much needed in the world today.

Mother-hood is not accomplished by birthing. That is a job accomplished by animals. Mother-ing is realized, when women adorn that role with responsibility of love and a spiritual caring.

Let us, as women, be very vigilant on reasons of bringing God’s soul into our bodies; let us, as women, pledge that body an unconditional love and caring protection; let us, as women, be cautious not to commit a sin for the highest honor bestowed on us by Grace – as SHE found us worthy.